


Say Anything

by kalegreeneyes



Category: House M.D.
Genre: M/M, Manic!Alvie, Self-Harm, idk - Freeform, mentioned daddy kink
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-08
Updated: 2016-08-08
Packaged: 2018-08-07 09:14:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7709386
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kalegreeneyes/pseuds/kalegreeneyes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alvie forgets his meds in favor of some spicy morning sex with his favorite mean doctor and has a hard day as a result, but house comes in clutch with that good shit.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Say Anything

 

 

It’s always no more than a few seconds long— the switch, that is.The switch, or Alvie going into one state or the other, happens for different reasons usually.He gets scared, sometimes, and it shoots him sky high in his brain, or maybe he just wakes up and can’t fucking get out of bed, can’t— he just can’t.This time the switch happens at 4:26pm on a Thursday afternoon.He feels fine, watching 8 mile with his cat Lupe Fiasco draped across his lap, and then it starts setting in.

At first, he just feels a little anxiety in his chest and throat.Maybe his veins feel a little busy, but just in the arteries, its no big deal. None at all.But his mind speeds up in short sentences, quick and sharp and to the point, or no point at all, and his legs start going, just one at first, tapping and tapping, up and down and up and down and up-

The other leg starts going up every time the other goes up and he watches it and stands up.Lupe Fiasco meows in distress as he catches himself, stalks off in a defiant stride towards the kitchen.Alvie laughs once, but it sounds distressed.He knows what’s happened, muses on it out loud to himself while he walks around the house.His legs move fast. He hops on every third step because he can and it’s something to do. He drums on the walls, remembers what he’s supposed to be thinking about.How did this happen?

He thinks back to earlier in the morning- House’s stubble dragging across his thighs, scratching against his jaw, reddening his lips.He remembers each little moan from himself, each gasp and grunt from Greg, the name ‘papi’ affectionately drawled in between long, drawn out silences where his mouth was…occupied, to say the least.His meds went forgotten on the night stand.He needs his meds.He got better so he could find House, he found House, he needs to stay better.His fucking skin is _crawling_ with the energy thrumming in his brain. Something is in his skin, he thinks, but then decides that’s not true. He lays flat on the floor and jiggles his legs, somewhere along the way he picked up a bouncy ball that he throws at the walls and catches and his arms still itch, “ _FUCK!”_ he screams.He spits bars that don’t quite match up, which makes him angry, but he gets over it.He smiles wide at Lupe and makes him fly around for a while but has to put him down because his skin is crawling too much, so he takes a shower, and then another and another, and when the _fuck_ is Greg getting back? He wants to fuck, or maybe get on a plane.They should go to Hawaii.He gets on the internet and buys two watches and a gold dinner plate to hang on the wall.He almost buys plane tickets, but thinks to at least ask House first.He cleans and cleans and reorganizes everything in the house by color and sits back down when there is absolutely nothing to do.It’s only 5:30.He has two hours.He rolls around on the couch, and feels it twist from productive to something so…uncomfortable.He can’t sit still, he doesn't have anything to do. No one to talk to.Lupe Fiasco isn’t there in his lap and it hurts his feelings. He has a lot of emotions, frustration mostly.He wants to get it out but he can’t and he can’t and he can’t and he’s zoned out on thiscartoon (he doesn’t remember changing the channel) and his legs are still bouncing.He’s breathing fast, blinking over and over and over and over and over and he’s so terribly uncomfortable.His muscles feel restless, he’s been moving yet unaware.He’s so unaware.He can’t believe he forgot his meds.

 

When House gets home, he hears the tv at full volume clashing with the sound of loud music through cell phone speakers.He hears Alvie laughing periodically, but too often still to be considered normal.The house smells like lemon pledge and clorox, and nothing is where he left it at all.His heart speeds up a little, because he knows that he’s going to find Alvie manic.Manic and alone for the first time in months and months, maybe even over a year or two. He hopes to god that the cat is okay and not shaved or some dumb shit.He hopes the walls are all the same color.His patience is already wearing thin for this day, so he sighs and trudges to the couch. 

He rounds the arm rest and when he sees his boyfriend, its really not what he expected.It’s worse. Alvie jumps up-

“Yo yo yo, Heezy in the heezy, HA! What’s up doc, how was the work place? Save any weird lives? Crazy people not crazy and it’s just malaria or something? Hey! Have you ever seen a mosquito get so full that it pops because I saw a video on youtube once and there was blood _everywhere_ , but you see so much blood that it wouldn’t even gross you out, huh? I missed you all day, thought you might never ever ever get back!” He says, gesturing wildly.He spits a little when he talks that fast. House is staring at his arms, though, and he doesn’t get it.

“Alvie, did you take your meds today?” He asks, voice uncharacteristically soft and caring for when he’s being this much of a little shit. 

Alvie pauses and laughs uncomfortably, scratches at the back of his neck, “No, haha, but hey, it’s okay! I’m okay, just, y’know, a little fast today, Papi! I’ll get back to it tomorrow, yo-“ He spins in a circle and jumps up onto the couch, looking down at House with a giant smile, “Hey, listen!” He points at Lupe, who’s watching him with a bored expression on top of the entertainment center, “Lupe’s a bad kitty, wild and mean, he’d slap a girl’s titty and drink thirty cups of lean, raised in the city he’s a real tom cat, but now he’s livin’ large; Heezy an’ Alvie made ‘im fat!” He raps with a disorganized syntax, motioning wildly, and House grabs his hands, and he shuts up. 

He gets off the couch, looks up at him and then down at their hands with a smile, thinking he’s coming onto him.That’s when he sees the blood on his arms, on his hands, under his nails-

“Oh,” his heart picks up speed as well as his breathing.He doesn’t like it when he does that, and this time it’s just so _bad_ , he’s so ashamed, “I don’t suppose I can blame that on Lupe?” 

House shakes his head, “I don’t suppose you can. Hands get too restless?” 

“Don’t know, didn’t know I did that, I’m sorry, I’ll uh- I’ll take care of it! I just gotta wash it off, its okay, wait here-“ he tries to pull away but house just holds harder.

“Stay here, Juan, I’ll get you a xanax. And then I’ll get you cleaned up when you’re calm enough to take sitting still.”

Being called Juan always makes Alvie feel a bit like a bruised puppy, but it’s okay.He nods and starts pacing when House leaves to get his Xanax. he lets him push it into his mouth even though he fights it. He doesn’t wanna be barred out when he’s flying so high now, but he knows that its for the _best._ He laughs, but he doesn’t think it’s very funny.House sits on the couch and pulls him into his lap, squeezes him so, so tight until he calms down inside, until the xanax kills all the fun parts of what’s happened.Then he just starts crying, but House doesn’t say anything about that.

House gave him alot, because it takes a lot to counter a true manic state like that. He’s leaning against the wall next to the toilet that he’s sitting on while he just holds his arms out.Greg takes his time with this, observes both of them.They have scratches that run too deep all over both forearms, a few on his shoulders.Most are bleeding, only some are bleeding enough to drip, others only taking on the form of leaking white blood cells. He cleans each one and pours hydrogen peroxide over all of them.Alvie doesn’t hiss. He does sigh.

“I should have taken my meds,” he bites his lip and casts his eyes down to watch the process. Antibiotic ointment.

“It’s okay, honey,” House keeps his voice even and kind, “You were preoccupied. It’s an honest mistake, and unfortunately, it has big consequences with you.You’ll just have to stay on the Xanax until the meds will work well again.”He places non adhesive gauze pads down everywhere because they won’t stick to the wounds when they leak, wraps it all in white bandages when he’s done with those.Alvie just nods, too resigned to do anything about it.

“You going in to work tomorrow?” he asks, and House shakes his head. He hates it when Alvie has to be this quiet and zoned out.

“No, I’ll stay here with you. Make sure you’re okay.”

Alvie takes a long second to think about this.He’s never once had someone outside of the psych wards actually care about him.People he sees in public from the psych wards usually just ignore him in public, like they’re ashamed of him.House takes him to work.House has sex with him on a regular basis, but doesn't make him feel gross about it at all.House takes care of him and calls him Juan but not like he’s mad at him, like he actually cares enough to use his real name sometimes. House, the most calloused and bitter person that Alvie may have ever met, holds utmost compassion for him even when he’s at his most annoying.He closes his eyes and nods, takes a deep breath in.

“I love you.”

House stops wrapping his arms for only three seconds, but Alvie counts each one until— “I love you too, Juan.”

He breathes easy for the first time all day.

 


End file.
